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Day 119.  Counting Blessings

6/22/2015

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Today makes 27 days in the hospital. I'm feeling it.  Today was one of those days when my emotions were all over the place.  This morning Meghan and Whinnie arrived early to spend the morning with me before they head back to Sudbury and work. 

She surprised with water colours and artist paper.  I have never painted, or drawn anything.  Doesn't matter, says Meg, this is for fun and to let your mind take a break.  She's a smart girl. We sat in the kitchen painting for eternity. There was nothing or nobody, just her and I and the paint.  I loved it.  She has talent, mine is another story, but it sure was fun!

While Meg was here Jerri and Barry were busy shopping and cooking for the week.  It was a nice break for Barry to be away from here for a part of the day.  They wanted to go to a Blue Jays game but it was sold out! So they went to a big screen sports bar to watch. Meg had left by then and I thought I would sleep. I didn't. I tried to read but couldn't concentrate enough so I just read news articles and made a couple of calls. Not having someone here changes everything, it's a lonely, depressing place. I see many who have been here for months on end and their families have had to get back to work and go on with their lives. It has to be very tough.

Depression is very common in rehabs. Most have been through trauma and life changing situations. It is talked about a lot by doctors, OT's and others. They often want to treat you for it but they don't have a psychologist or counsellors on staff to help those who need it.  Thankfully, I have done well not to become depressed. It can be difficult not to become depressed when you just want your life back.  Having gone through this before I know there is a light at the end of the tunnel. I won't give in to it.

I have had to shield myself somewhat to prevent it because there is incredible sadness on this floor. Young, very young women, who have suffered strokes in the prime of their lives, young families with one parent very affected by stoke and then wives and husbands our ages who will never be the same again. 

I have a lot to be grateful for.  I have my family with me as much as possible, I will recover.  We don't know what if any deficiencies I will be left with but I do know I can live with them.  This has been a longer, harder road then any of us prepared for, but it certainly could be worse and I am reminded of that fact daily.

People…look after your health! Know the signs of stoke and if you have them or someone you love has them act very quickly as every second counts.

F. Face is your face drooping

A. Arms can you raise both arms

S. Speech is speech slurred or jumbled

T. Time. Act fast call 911

http://www.heartandstroke.com/site/c.ikIQLcMWJtE/b.3483937/k.ED98/Stroke__Stroke_Warning_Signs.htm



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    Maureen Clout

    I'm going in for a 4th neurosurgery; this time it's a repair to my lumbar fusion. Here, I will post my daily updates on dealing with diagnosis, surgery and recovery. Join me on my journey.

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