Pain Fog: Living in spite of Chronic Pain
  • Home
  • About
  • Blog
  • Resources
    • Body Scan
    • Trial and Error
    • Relationships
    • Parenting in Pain
    • Mental Health
    • What the Doctors Don't Tell You
    • Travel
  • Contact

Day 58. Let Go and Let The Healing Begin. 

4/20/2015

0 Comments

 
Today a young friend of mine is having neurosurgery. He called me yesterday to talk about it because we had gotten together previously to discuss living with chronic pain. He was very resistant to the idea of surgery at the time and the last two years have been spent trying to manage his pain. As he found out on his own, we all have to reach this decision by ourselves; sometimes surgery is the lessor of two evils.

He is an incredible young man. He has accomplished so much in his twenty-five years that it was such a shame to see how pain had dragged him down. A tenacious soul, he kept crawling back up until he just couldn't do it anymore. Sleepless nights, debilitating pain and leg weakness is not something you can "work through". If it were, he would have kept going. I'm picturing him at the hospital right now and how foreign it must feel for him to be so vulnerable, as it is usually he who helps those in need. This young man is a recipient of a Top 20 under 20 award for Canada, and has already accomplished more than most in a lifetime. He has traveled all over the world and affected change in many of the places he has visited. This past six months he tried to continue to travel with increasingly debilitating pain. He found it is possible but it just zapped the joy out of everything he did. It was time to let go and allow the medical community to take over. He is having step one and two of my three part surgery, ironically in the exact same area of the back as me. It is a long recovery and he has never been still before. Part of our conversation was about that very thing - being still long enough to allow healing to be complete.

It seems to be a theme this week. Another dear friend has come down with what she first thought was bronchitis, but is pneumonia. The difficulty she had in allowing herself the permission to cancel already scheduled meetings, etc., was noted. She is a yoga teacher, she is mindful, and yet letting the world around her stop for a minute was hard. She said once she did, there was a great sense of freedom that followed. A permission to get well without a time line.

I've often wondered why I have gotten ill. I usually don't pick up a common cold or anything minor, it is usually pneumonia or something equally daunting. It doesn't seem to happen anymore, and I think I know why. I have slowed my life down. It was when I was moving at an incredible pace that I would suddenly have to come to a complete stop. I remember working part time, coaching fast pitch and working for a local charity as a volunteer. I was chair of not one, but two parent councils for each of my children's schools and the parent representative at the school board. Not to mention I had two very active girls who I cared for and drove around everywhere for their events and activities. I guess getting pneumonia was how I got a break. When you juggle so much in you life your head is always full. It doesn't allow for quiet peaceful moments that let creativity creep in. I know that now. I have way more time on my hands than I want at the moment, but I will never again over schedule myself the way I have in the past.

Allowing ourselves some down time to sit in our PJ's to read a book, newspapers or watch T.V. may seem like a lazy thing to do, but we all need to refuel at times and that's how we do it as humans.

As I look at the clock I see it is almost surgery time for my friend. My hope is that he discovers he can have a pain free life, that all goes well and he allows his body the time it needs to heal. The world needs more young people like him and we need him to be well. I thank God for modern medicine at times like this.

When he called me yesterday he said it was so he could tell me he was going to "rock this surgery" and I have no doubt that he will! Good luck my friend and be well.
0 Comments



Leave a Reply.

    Picture

    Maureen Clout

    I'm going in for a 4th neurosurgery; this time it's a repair to my lumbar fusion. Here, I will post my daily updates on dealing with diagnosis, surgery and recovery. Join me on my journey.

    About

    Archives

    April 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    November 2015
    October 2015
    September 2015
    August 2015
    July 2015
    June 2015
    May 2015
    April 2015
    March 2015
    February 2015

    Categories

    All
    Bad News
    Chronic Pain
    Crisis
    Daily Life
    Depression
    Doctors Appointments
    Family
    Fear
    Focus
    Friends
    Frustration
    Goals
    Help
    Insomnia
    Laugh
    Learning
    Leg Pain
    Meditation
    Memory
    Mindfulness
    Nap
    Neurosurgery
    Pain
    Pain Management
    Planning
    Preparing For Surgery
    Rehabilitation
    Risk
    Serenity
    Service
    Sleep
    Stress
    Strong
    Support
    Surgeon Appointments
    Surgery
    Toronto Western Hospital
    Travel
    Waiting

    RSS Feed

Powered by Create your own unique website with customizable templates.