Once I was fully awake I reached for it to find text messages, Facebook messages and blog messages. It was great actually. It took me from the trivial stuff around here to what's important. That is family and friends.
A lot of you are going through a lot of life changes yourselves and it has been very heartening to be a part of it as I go through mine. I know I have said it before but it bares repeating, we all have challenges, emotional and/or physical. It's how we face what's put before us is what counts. I am of the belief that there is no getting away from it. You have to go through it to come out the other side whole. Denial and making nice just means it will show up again another time in life in a different situation, with the same lesson. Much easier if you get the lesson the first time I think. Most times it is simply we are much stronger than we think, we all need each other to survive and we only have limited control. Almost any situation will hand you those messages if you look hard at them.
This morning alone, I have spoken to, or had contact with four people with chronic pain conditions, along with a young man who is recovering from a spinal surgery, another is waiting for a serious heart surgery and two others whose lives are filled with emotional pain. Those are just relatives and friends that I have heard from in the last couple of hours. If you really sit and think about your circle of friends and family, you too will see you are not alone. You may be alone in your condition, but not in your pain.
Sounds ominous. It isn't. It's life. That's their path, and only one part of their lives. As I said the other day, your body is not yourself, only a part of it.
That also applies to the emotional pain. What has happened in your life has happened. You cannot change that. You do have to go through it, and once you do, it is in the past and the future is ahead of you.
Too many of us think once we have had some kind of emotional experience that we can't shake it. We have that label for life. Same is true of a physical label, it is ours for life some times but it doesn't have to be our life. You have MS for instance, you are not MS.
All of those people I spoke to this morning were loving and encouraging despite what is going on in their lives. There's always room to be kind to others. That is something that always humbles me. The capacity of the human spirit for loving kindness is endless.
Last weekend Barry and Meg put the boat in the water. They did this with the hope of me being able to get out there at least once to watch a sunset, catch a fish or simply just feel the wind on my face. All week the wind was higher than my back could handle, time was getting short. It didn't look like it was going to happen. I was going to bed at night thinking about summers past and a long fun day on the boat, fishing or swimming. I have images in my head of all of us trailing back from the marina after a long day on the water, sand on our feet, sun on our faces and smiles on everyone's faces.
After our luxury lunch we broke out the fishing poles. By then I was already fatigued so I fished for a few minutes then put the seat back and laid down to watch Meg and Barry fish. Meg caught one. Anyone who has been fishing with me knows what I did next...I got up off that comfortable reclined seat and started fishing again. I had to get one. Meg ended up catching another and Barry caught two. I did catch a fish, but I put him back, I may catch him again in a few years. Let's just say his time wasn't up yet. They were all too small to keep but fun to catch. I felt fulfilled and happy as we headed home. Seeing Whinnie perched on the back of the boat with a smile on her face does my heart good. She's a funny dog. Such a fun day.
The last call I got before writing this morning was from my neurosurgeon's office. They called to change the time of my surgery. It is same day, Thank God, but now instead of 6am I show up at 9.30am. A little more civilized, but no more changes....please. I get it, I'm not in control!