Month 18: Knee Pain

My knee has needed to be replaced for as long as I can remember. I overused it years ago while learning to walk again. You see I don't feel the left side of my body, therefore I leaned very heavily on it when I was starting to walk again. What I didn't know was I was shifting most of my weight onto that knee and using the strength of the left leg to make up for the deficiency on the right. It worked. It got me walking again, but it put enormous strain on the joint and it wore down. A couple of years later I started to have a lot of trouble with it. Several minor surgeries later and I was told I would need a replacement. That was at least ten years ago.
My surgeons in Toronto think it is a very risky surgery for me and wanted me to wait. Well I have waited and luckily found a work around. It is a product called synvisc. It comes as an injection and is put right into the knee. It adds cushioning where there is none. I have had as many as three shots a year and some years only one. I had carefully scheduled one for this month to help with my walking. I got a call yesterday cancelling today's shot. I was told the doctor wants further investigation before I have another shot. My luck may have run out.
I'm waiting to hear back from them but my hope is I get a shot before the Europe trip because without it, walking is painful.
Then there's the risk of being told my time is up and surgery is required sooner rather than later.
That will be a very careful decision and I can't go there right now so I'm choosing to not even think about it.